Saturday, January 30, 2016
I had to left this blog when I bought my own domain. I didn't forget to update this one, I just decided to stop. And now, I am coming back to this. Its been a month when the hosting of my blog expired. I didn't notice that until I checked my blog. And now i lost everything. Not really, i have to choose between paying the hosting dues and retrieve every post I created, or change the hosting and lost everything.
I think that to start something better for this year, I could just delete every post I made with my other blog and give a few shot to what I am really wanting to write. A novel? A short love story? A poem? I don't know yet. It's really hard to decide. I need to discuss this with a friend, if I relly want the best decision.
As of now, I am returning to this blog. My blog. This shows who I am, before and now. This will lead you to the inner soul of mine. So please, if you are interested, show me some sign. Some effort. Maybe you should start reading this blog.
Posted by Bernadette Zephyr at 10:00 PM
Monday, August 11, 2014 Dead Poet Society, Jumanji, Robin Williams, Robin Williams Dead, Robin Williams Suicide
July 21, 1951 – August 11, 2014
|Robin Williams on Mork & Mindy|
As I opened my Facebook this morning, my newsfeed was flooded by the news that Robin Williams, one of the best actors worldwide was found dead on his apartment. His cause of death was suicide. His publicist said that Mr. Williams was experiencing severe depression.
Robin Williams was not one of my favorite actors but he used to be a great one. Especially on comedy films. I watched him in Dead Poet Society and Jumanji when I was younger.
Mr. Williams portrayed a lot of characters in different movies and each characters left a special part in our hearts. Each characters taught us something that we apply in our lives.
Everyone in the world, either his fan or not, young or old, we know that this news is a shocking one. I feel sad and I am grieving for what has happened to him.
May you rest in peace Mr. Keating. I will always say "Carpe Diem".
For more detailed report, please read on: Robin Williams Dead: Beloved Actor Dies In Apparent Suicide
*Photo Credits from Google Images.
Posted by Bernadette Zephyr at 6:17 PM
I’m not sure if I am capable of writing a little something about this issue. I don’t know where to start. But as promised to one of my closest guy friend, I will sum up everything I did for the past 5 months for me to fully recover from an unexpected break-up situation.
To be honest, I saw the “thing” coming. I felt that the relationship was soon to end. But still, I wasn’t that prepared. I thought I will end up cheating with my partner or fall in love with someone else as the reason for the break-up. But, it wasn't turned out that way.
Of course in every relationship, both can make a mistake. Both can have their own point of view. Mine was: I loved too much. I got jealous. End of the story.
I was too vulnerable to pain. I asked too much for attention. To be loved. To be appreciated. To be accepted. Failing a relationship which I thought was good and forever was a total pain. More to say, my pride was deeply hurt.
So, how did someone like me, a not-so-strong girl overcome this phase?
Hang out with Friends
Yes. Friends. My friends played a huge part on my moving-on situation. They've been there. Always there. They listened to my agonies, they gave me advised, and they stayed. They showed me that even when I failed with the wrong relationship, I will never be alone. Because they will always be there.
Travel as much as you can
March 2014 – Burot experience with my friends in the office. Everything started here. For me to help myself get back on the shape, I travel. Every month, whenever there is an invitation for an outing, get together, movie dates, mall hopping or any activities, as long as I am available, I join. I went to different places and tried new adventures.
Beer all the way!
They say that drinking beers won’t solve anything. When you’re sober, you’ll still get to remember everything. You can still feel the pain. But seriously, if there were no beers, I might never recover that fast. Haha. Drinking a bottle or two of beers, with the right people can really help.
Socialize with everybody
It’s not everyday that we meet new people. Being friendly is in my nature. I talk to everybody. During my moving on days, I tend to talk to different people aside from my friends. New people who doesn't know my story yet. Gladly, last March, our office expanded and more people got hired. I befriend some of them, I knew people from every account and I stayed nice. It did help.
Smile, have a crush, love again – there are many fishes in the ocean ;)
I think above everything else, what helped me the most is the idea that she’s not the only person in the world. I can still love and be loved. It’ll just take time. Also, someone did help me to move on (not that he knew any of this – he’s totally clueless). I focused my attention to him, gave anything that I can give, I was nice to him and so was he to me. As soon as I have totally moved on from my ex, my friendship with this guy has also ended.
Accept what needs to be accepted
It was a month or three after the break-up before I fully accepted the fact that we can never get back together. That the relationship has truly ended. It was hard to accept something like this but I HAD TO. I accepted the fact that I made a mistake but also opened my mind that not everything was my fault. I had to accept, though it hurt that she has found a new love. She fell out of love with me because she fell in love with someone else. I had to accept that some relationship won’t last.
Pray for the courage – talk to HIM
I may not look like a spiritual person but I do know how to pray. Actually, I didn't pray, I talked to God. I asked him to guide me, to help me get through this easily. I asked for the courage to leave everything behind for me to start the new chapter of my life. And from then, I believed that God has a better plan for me. He did put me on a better place.
There, I guess I've listed all. Here’s from me to you all: Shit happens and it’s OKAY.
Posted by Bernadette Zephyr at 3:05 AM
21st Floor. Going down. Aba'y akalain mo, minsan nga naman kapag di sinadya, dun may nangyayaring kakaiba, dun kayo magkakasabay. Sa elevator pa. Paboritong lugar mo na nga to eh. Mahaba haba kahit papaano ang lakbayin, 21st to 2nd floor. Apat na corners lang, kaya hindi ka matatakbuhan. Winner.
Minsan naman. Paakyat ka, palabas sila ng elevator. Yuyuko ka na lang. Kunyari wala kang nakita, sabay lingon para tignan kung lilingunin ka ren. Medyo adik lang. Pero effective. Kasi nasaktan ka sa pag-aassume mo. Hindi sya lumingon.
Talo ka kapag dalawa lang kayo na sasakay sa elevator, hindi sya sasakay kasi. Dahil may dalawa pang option, hihintayin nya either yung service elevator o kaya yung sirang elavator na dumadaan every floor. Makaiwas lang sayo. Hanep ano? Palos eh.
Pero kapag kasama ang tropa. Ang tahimik mo. Lahat ata ng salita nalunok mo. Puro ka tawa at hagikgik. Anong nangyare? Wala. Na-tense ka. Habang sya, kausap mga tropa mo at nakikipag biruan sa kanila. Bigti na. IKAW lang ang dine-deadma na. Nilaglag ka pa nila.
Sa elevator kasi, minsan hindi ka makakapamili. Wala kang choice ika nga. Parang love lang. Bakit mo nga naman ipagsisisksikan kung alam mong puno na, pero wala kang choice minsan kundi sumakay. Lalo na kung umusog ang sakay para makapasok ka. Pero once na makapasok at makasakay ka na, bababa ka pa ren once na nakita mong "overloading" na.
Naisip ko lang. Masaya ako sa elevator na to. At hindi ko pa sya kayang iwan.
Posted by Bernadette Zephyr at 8:27 AM
July 11, 2014 - 24th Birthday ko. Sa lahat ng kaarawan ko, ito yung taon na masasabi kong galak ang naramdaman ko bukod sa saya. Hindi ako nag-expect ng kahit na ano; regalo, surpresa, espesyal na bagal mula sa mga kaibigan ko, pamilya - pero sa huli naging masaya ang buong araw ko.
Hindi ko naisip na kulang ang selebrasyon ng kaarawan ko kahapon dahil may mga tao, o may isang tao na hindi nakabati. Okay lang yun. Ang mahalaga, eh yung mabalitaan ko na maayos rin sya. At valid ang rason nya.
Umaga pa lang, marami na akong natanggap na pagbati. Facebook, Texts, Viber, Skype at Personal greetings. Masaya sa pakiramdam dahil may mga nakaalala. May mga nag effort na gamitin ang mga daliri nila para mag type ng "Happy Birthday".
Simpleng pagbati, simpleng pag-recognize na araw ko kahapon. Puro saya, biruan, at pagiging kuntento. Tama, sa buong buhay ko, kahapon ko naramadaman yung salitang kuntento. Na kahit walang regalo akong natanggap, parang ang saya saya ko. At buo ang araw ko.
Until, sa hindi inaasahan... may nagpasa sa akin ng link. YouTube link. Gumawa pala ng video ang mga ka-opisina ko. Na touched ako, na appreciate ko sobra. Kahit mas malakas ang tunog ng "In The End" kumpara sa greetings nila. :)
Isa pa sa mga nagpasaya sa akin kahapon ay ang pagtupad ko sa isang simpleng pangarap na hindi ko akalaing sasakto sa birthday ko. May DSLR na ko! Canon pa! Haha! Masaya lang talaga ako. Sa loob ng 2 taon at mahigit 6 na buwan kong pagtatrabaho, nakabili ako ng isang bagay na talagang gusto ko para sa sarili ko. Push ko ang photography lalo na sa foods at sa Toothless ko.
So, sa kaarawan kong Simple, Pero TUNAY na Rock! Maraming salamat sa lahat ng bumati. Pakiramdam ko , napaka espesyal ko. Daig pa ang siopao :) At higit sa lahat, sobrang nagpapasalamat ako sa pagiging blessed.
Sample Shots :P Pagbigyan, Please!
Posted by Bernadette Zephyr at 6:31 PM
Hello July!!! Please be good to me! Pretty please?
Oh come on! Do I really have to say these words? I really hope not! July is my birth month. And I am hoping that no one nor nothing is going to ruin this special month for me. Please try not to create more drama in my life. I am so over these dramatic cliché! I want changes. And I want to believe that this is possible.
24 years have passed. Many things have changed. I am not the same girl that I used to be on my 18th birthday. And I am not the same lady that I used to be a year ago. Now that I am about to enter another stage of my life, I could say that I am proud of what I have become.
Stronger. Fiercer. More mature. Have learned a lot from previous experiences. This is Zephyr. The new Zephyr. Though I am still vulnerable to pain, I can say that now, I am more prepared on how people will treat me. I became an open-minded young lady that can accept that fact that some people could never like me, or treat me nice. Some people will come and then leave with no apparent reason. And my response on these things will always be: “That's OK”.
For the biggest change in my life. I will start with LOVE. Yes, love. I hope that I can do this one. I will now focus on my job, on my career, on what I truly want in my life, I will focus on myself now. I am turning 24 and I want to see myself as a successful young woman at the age of 25. As I would say, “tama na muna ang landi, trabaho muna!”. No more chasing. No more boys. No more thinking about my ex. This time, my life will just revolve around me, my family, my job and my friends.
So July, bring on the rain! Bring on all the positive vibes. I know we can make it. I can make it.
First Day of July 2014.
Posted by Bernadette Zephyr at 9:50 AM
“Your request has been rejected”.
Of course, there's no report for that. I found out by myself. My request to follow has been rejected. I saw that coming but I refused the idea of being rejected. I hoped high to being approved rather than being rejected. But that's fine. After all, this is not the first time. So it didn't hurt that much.
Oh well, I have been rejected many times. But what I have realized on those countless rejections was, in every single rejection, multiple acceptance by worth it people came rushing to me. So what's the sense of being sad? Why on earth should I care for those people who can't like me back. Always remember that we can never please everybody. Never!
So tonight, as I think of the last person who've just rejected a “connection request” from me, all I can say is: IT'S OKAY. Thank you for not giving me a chance to show myself a little more. I won't be angry, I won't take this badly. I know you have your reason. And yes, I have been rejected by you, but I am still happy because you're not mad at me. And that's one of the few things I need to know. :)
Tomorrow, the next day, on next month.. I'll be like: Heads up. Chin up. Walk straight. WHO YOU ka sakin! Wala kang Chatime! :P (Kidding)
Posted by Bernadette Zephyr at 9:12 AM